Lame,lame sunday it has begun...
as i woke up in the morning realising that my "smarty pants" boyfriend had just flown to AUSTRALIA continuing his studies...
okay okay...
i got mad as i should be when you knew that your boyfriend would leave you for a hell-ong of a time and not telling you earlier so you could prepare for the worst and all...
i got mad...we fought...
he had no rights in winning any of our fight and he gave in...
and i dumbly asked for a break-up in which now i regret most...
as if the day gets any better,
that on a snowy morning such as this i had some extra volunteer working to attend to in my "beloved" high school's programme at the general hospital...
after some nags and "word wars" with mum...
i finally gave in when she used her blackmailing tactics of grounding me and stuff...veto authorities such as her would be better off in the politics than at home i reckon...
my pace on the snow became faster as the cold of the ice is really getting into my bones...
.............................................................................
here in the hospital i am suppose to assist all kinds of people...
kids, senior and if i'm lucky...teens such as me...
though they're not as uck as i am to be on the bedsheets being sick...
as if by fate, i did get paired up with a teen...
her name is michelle allison...
actually allison had been in and out of gh because of her third stage leukimia...
pity for such a beautiful brown-eyed, auburn haired girl with such petite latin likeness of her...
to be in such state...
whenever we're together...we would share our stories of our boyfriends together...unfortunately this time...i'm boyfriendless...
we started talking and when we came to the part of the bf thingy...
i broke down into tiny pieces...she was startled as if there's one person who should be crying it wshoud have been michelle and not me...
then michelle said...
"girl...we often shed our egos on the wrong people...and in my opinion...you should not be too hard on him...you should always give him another chance...always...
if you feel hurt at what he has done to you...remember the good times you had together...that always heals...
my freddy(allison's anonymous boyfriend)had been crying for days lately as how you you are crying now as he fears of the fact that i would leave him and the world soon...
he fears of the loneliness that would befall on him...
but,knowing this i want him to be strong for himself and also for me...
everyday i would tell him that i will always be alive in his mind and heart...
i believe the secret to our "everlasting"
"listen to me with your eyes,and i think the last line is what he will do mostly after this..."
touch me with your words,
feed me with your love,
and care me with your thoughts..."
like it had been waiting for the moment...
a long-held teardrop in her eye...
an innocent teardrop fell like a piece of diamond on a pale-like angelic face of allison...running down her still rosy but fading cheeks down to her thin half smile lips...
in my head...with my eyes glued to allison...
i realise that love doesn't actually means that he had to see him all the time...
knowing all that he does by putting him right under your nose...
no...
that's not what love is...
loving someone means that you sometimes have to give him/her the space that he/she deserves
that includes studying and being away for a verrrrryyyy long time)
days pass by like the falling leaves in autumn...
slowly but, meaningful...
eventhough i still miss him today...and i know that somewhere out there...he misses me too...and i am not going to let him miss me alone...
p.s>>>R.I.P Michelle Allison Krest
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